Domestic Geek

The overwhelming feeling that my whole life path is a mistake is creeping back on me. Where did I go wrong? How did I manage to screw my life up this bad? I know part of that sinking feeling is just that I'm coming up on that time of month. But just part of it. I thought by the time I hit 40, I'd have a pretty good idea of where I was going and where I wanted to be. The fact is, I've got less of a clue now than I have at any point in my life. Is it that nagging notion that I'd better hurry up and figure this out getting the best of me? I don't know. I had a thought recently that really freaked me out. If I've only got the same amount of time left on this planet that my mom had, I've only got 11 years left. See, she died right before her 51st birthday. All I do know is that I have never felt this worthless, confused, hopeless or frustrated in my entire life. It's hard to keep telling yourself you're smart and talented when you've been trying to find a job for over six months and nobody will give you a chance.

As usual, I found drawing by Hugh MacLeod of Gaping Void that depict exactly what I'm feeling right now:

While purusing the Apple employment site for me yesterday, Marcus noticed that they are now hiring for a Park Meadows location. I wonder where over there they are planning to put it? I hope it's not in the mall itself. I hate going into that place. Anyway, sometime in the next few months, looks like we're going to another Apple Store opening!

Marcus and I had lunch at a place I think I've written about before called The Sub Stop. It's in the Hobby Lobby shopping center at 6th and Sable here in Aurora. The woman that runs or owns (not sure which) the place is awesome. She remembers her customers—a trait that is rare these days. Hey Mike, Nina and Sarah, she asked how you guys were doing since she hadn't seen you all in awhile! How cool is that? Oh, and they make awesome sweet tea there. I usually get something with roast beef in it—a french dip or a philly sub. They really pile on the ingredients, too. Go check it out!

Marcus got my some dinner from the New China Chef. Mmmm, I love crab cream cheese wontons. Yummay!

I tried making some a little while back. I didn't know you could buy canned crab meat like tuna. Anyway, I don't know if the wonton wrappers I bought at King Soopers sucked or whether I couldn't get an accurate temperature on the oil in the pan (my deep fat fryer bit the dust and I really need a new one), but they didn't turn out very good at all. One day I'll try them again with wrappers from somewhere else or I'll try making them from scratch. Bad wontons are yucky.

I missed a call on my cell phone from my old supervisor at my old job. That's three times he called this week. Geez, wonder what the heck he wanted this time. He didn't leave a message, so who knows? What a loser jerk.

I'm in the middle of watching Click and I see that a whole bunch of puzzle pieces were released. Is something wrong with Christopher Walkin? I saw him on Regis and Kelly a little while back and he seems to be not all there. I'll have to Google that later.

Man, I totally forgot to eat. I guess I'd better go do that.